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Confessions of a Graduate: Part 2

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“As far as I can tell it’s just about letting the universe know what you want, and working toward it, while letting go of how it comes to pass. Your job is not to figure out how it’s going to happen for you, but to open the door in your head, and when the door opens in real life, just walk through it. And don’t worry if you miss your cue, because there’s always doors opening. They keep opening. And when I say life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you, I really don’t know if that’s true.  I’m just making a conscious choice to perceive challenges as something beneficial so that I can deal with them in the most productive way. You’ll come up with your own style, that’s part of the fun” (Jim Carrey). “

What people don’t tell you about life is what happens after college. There are many angles to approach this topic.

Which in my part like many other  students comes down to …did you do your work on networking? Did you get any internships? Did you had a plan before and after college? Etc. 

I have to be honest, in my case when I started college at the beginning I was enthusiastic, passionate and I did have a plan about this whole journey. My train of thought was like that of many other students:

I attended classes, made decent grades, met  classmates, networked, and enjoyed my college life.

However,  at the last part of my college experience like many other college students…all I wanted at the end of the road was to graduate. ,and you don’t care anymore (you want you degree)…you want to start living your life in the “real world” because that’s what you keep hearing from time to time from the people that care about you. 

“The real world”…I have been living there for almost a year and a half and let me tell you… is not that different from your college experience…(when it comes to doing your daily activities) let me explain what I mean.  

If you are like the vast majority of students these days, where you had to take care of your own studies…such as living alone and paying everything own your own.

You know that no one will be on your tail telling you how to do anything and because of this you will have the ability to choose freely with no influence of anyone.

However, you can’t know for sure if you are doing the right decisions…all you have is your faith.

The faith that everything will turn out just fine no matter the odds. In my case, it has been complicated because of my indecision of not taking charge of my own life.

What i mean by that is either I let other people’s priorities overlap mine or I choose not to do much and make other people get involved in my activities. Which on either case comes down to the phase that I don’t enjoy facing challenges in my life. 

There are many reasons why people will choose to avoid challenge themselves; some of them could be that they are afraid to modify their daily routine, the fear of the unknown and the necessity of being perfect every step of the way. 

In my case, I am guilty of two of them. (there are plenty of other reasons why people don’t go look for challenges…these three are just some that I can think of right now) 

The fear of the unknown is something that actually terrifies me and I usually do everything in my power to stay away from that. 

I consider myself an introvert person who finds it difficult to interact in open activities such as social events. However, the best way to conquer uncomfortable activities is by exposing yourself to them(which I had done that in the past, but not in a productive way). 

I also have the issue of being a perfectionist person…which is not necessary that I do things perfectly but like Frank Sinatra said  “I did it my way”. Which sometimes has led me with poor results putting it bluntly.

“This is the voice of the ego and if you listen to it there will always be someone who is doing better than you…no matter what you gain, ego will not let you rest…it will tell you that you cannot stop until you’ve left an indelible mark on the earth…until you’ve achieved immortality…how tricky is this ego that it will tempt us with the promise of something we already possess” (Jimm Carrey).

The art of asking for help is something that most people are not good at  including myself and I am trying to find the answer to why is it so difficult.

The fact is that when it comes to asking someone for help in my view it seems as a sign of weakness. Asking for help seems to have a negative and because of my background it seems as a sign of weakness and a negative connotation. 

However, recently I figured out that really it was mostly in my head; the feeling of owing something to somebody.

Which is idiotic to think that not asking for help will somehow make you smarter than someone else. 

Anyways, the short story for me at this moment is that I am taking the necessary steps to get me back on track…challenge myself to stay away from my comfort zone, not panic under pressure, let other people help me  achieve my future goals and be more responsible with my actions aka “grow the f*** up” because it’s my life and I am the one who is going to live that regardless of anyone’s opinion. Thank you for your time guys.

(note: I enjoy a lot that Jim Carrey speech from 2014…I don’t know if the quotes made sense on this particular blog.However, I choose to put them here) 

 

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